Royal Rumble 2017: It was going so well…
So the 2017 Royal Rumble PPV is done and I thought it was one of the better PPVs I’ve seen from WWE in a while, as I said it could be. The four championship matches before the Royal Rumble match was really good, even a possible match of the year in one of them and the Rumble was going alright too…..until #30 showed up and almost ruined the whole damn thing…
Not much to say about the 3 pre-show matches other than congrats to the good brothers Karl Anderson and Luke Gallows on winning the WWE Raw Tag Team championships. Naomi pinning Alexa was a surprise as was Nia Jax beating Sasha in quick fashion.
Now onto the main PPV show. Charlotte beating Bayley was no surprise, she’s up to 16-0 in PPVs. Kevin Owens is still the Universal Champion, thanks to….Braun Strowman? Yup I don’t get it but hey at least it’s not Roman Reigns winning. That match was pretty good, the frog splash onto the table and the chair spot was top stuff. Chris Jericho didn’t have to do anything in this one. I still think he shouldn’t be in a freaking shark cage, he’s Chris Jericho damn it!
Neville is the new Cruiserweight champion, thank goodness for that. He’s been on fire since returning, in the ring and on the mic too for once. I’m just glad everyone is finally getting to see what I’ve known all along. You lot may jump aboard the Neville bandwagon.
AJ Styles vs John Cena could already be match of the year, it was seriously good. Kudos to the both of them for putting on a classic. Me being a Styles fan, I’m not happy about the ending. Also, surely they could have saved that historic 16th title reign for Cena on a WrestleMania right? I mean he might end up having a two week title reign with Elimination Chamber coming up real soon.
And now time for the 2017 Royal Rumble match!
#1: Big Cass – I called it! I said he’d be #1 or #2 just so he and Enzo can have their little shtick at the start of any of their matches.
#2 Chris Jericho – WHAT? Why is Jericho out so early? Then again, if anyone could last the distance, Y2J is the guy who can do just that. He had the perfect game plan too, picking his spot and taking a break when he needed. As I said, I wanted him to win this and for him to be eliminated by “that guy” really pissed me off. At least he was in the final 4 and lasted 1 hour and 13 seconds, which I believe puts him 3rd in the all time list for the longest appearance in a Rumble.
He does now have the record for the longest time spent in cumulative Rumble appearances, well over 5 hours in 10 matches! His only elimination was that of Sheamus and Cesaro, but a really good one at that too. I did like his tactic of saving energy outside the ring a few times. He’s a smart man people.
#3 Kalisto – Meh. The last two Rumbles saw a surprise entrant in this spot. It would have been nice to see someone like a Pete Dunne or Trent Seven from the UK tournament make a surprise appearance in the Rumble match in this spot.
#4 Mojo Rawley – Not a fan of the guy but I can’t complain about this one, he did earn his spot by winning a battle royal.
#5 Jack Gallagher – Woohoo! Go Jacky boy! I did say a 205 Live guy would show up and Gallagher was my first choice, I’m glad they did go with him. He had some nice spots with William the third. Shame he was the first one eliminated and was there mainly for the comedic relief. I’d love to see him in a match against Chris Jericho someday in the future.
#6 Mark Henry – WHAT? I wasn’t expecting to see him, not sure if you can call him a surprise entrant. At least he had a better showing than last year and if this was to be his last Rumble, at least it was in his home state of Texas.
#7 Braun Strowman – One of the big favourites is in very early! I did not want to see him win the Rumble so at least I knew it wouldn’t happen with his early entrance. He was on fire in that match, had the most eliminations with 7. I was half expecting Reigns to come out and get him eliminated so imagine my shock when I saw him eliminated by Baron Corbin. Even bigger shock, I had to see it on a reply as the network froze during Corbin’s entrance so I had no idea what happened to him and #10 initially.
#8 Sami Zayn – Ok well this one was no secret since we already knew he drew #8 from the tumbler scene with Ambrose. Don’t ruin the surprise for us please. He had a great showing, lasted a long while and well, he took a jackhammer from Goldberg and got eliminated by The Undertaker. Not many people can say that.
#9 Big Show – I called it! I knew he’s showed up once Braun showed up. He was in there only to make Braun look good, as did Henry.
#10 Tye Dillinger – HAHA THEY ACTUALLY DID IT! The Perfect 10 coming in as entrant #10. At least for once WWE did listen to the fans. He did alright in there, and like Strowman I didn’t see his elimination. I wonder if this means he’ll be in the main roster now or still be sticking around in NXT.
#11 James Ellsworth – Errr….okay? I kinda knew this would be another joke entrant. Good to see Ellsworth and Strowman back at it again…for the few seconds they were in the ring together. Ambrose bailing on him for Strowman was pretty funny, that gave me a good laugh.
#12 Dean Ambrose – Yet again I called this one. The moment I saw Ellsworth I thought, maybe Ambrose will be next. He lasted 26 minutes but didn’t really do much in this Rumble for once, did he? Can’t remember anything big he did. Lesnar eliminated him, no surprise there.
#13 Baron Corbin – Another big men in but I will say he has been impressing me little by little lately and also his elimination of Strowman did surprise me, one of the better highlights of the match.I thought he might do a bit more but yeah, just the one elimination in 32 minutes.
#14 Kofi Kingston – The first member of the New Day is in! His typical Rumble spot this year wasn’t that great if I’m honest, he jumped from the top rope, damn near impaled himself and hung on to the ring post.
#15 The Miz – He lasted a good 32 minutes in there but like a lot others, didn’t get to eliminate anyone. Seems like WWE were only allowing the big boys that honour this year.
#16 Sheamus – The first former winner of a Rumble is in. He and Cesaro had their little bit getting rid of New Day before he turned on his tag team partner, once again I called that one.
#17 Big E – Ohhhh San Antonio! This is when I noticed something funny was happening. Big E suddenly jumped up to something, the cameras moved away and back to him making his way to the ring quite quickly. Why? He, like a few big men, all took the golf kart to make their way down the long ramp inside the Alamodome. Come on guys, exercise!
#18 Rusev – What the heck is that on his face! I didn’t knew he broke his nose so he wore a face mask similar to what Cody Rhodes did during his undashing phase.
#19 Cesaro – Not surprised he was next with his partner in just a few entries before. He was involved in that bit with the New Day. At least he did give almost everyone in the ring during that time a Cesaro Swing, including his tag partner Sheamus…well almost.
#20 Xavier Woods – Not surprised he was next with his partners in just a few entries before. He was involved in that bit with the Sheamus and Cesaro. See what I did there? Yup their appearance were all linked together. Oh well. A bit too gimmicky for me.
#21 Bray Wyatt – And the lights go out! Now we’re into the business end of the Rumble starting with Wyatt. He had his best showing in a Rumble so far and he didn’t even eliminate one person. For a while I thought he might win it. He almost did. Almost.
#22 Apollo Crews – Why? He’s not done much on SmackDown anyway, didn’t do much here either. That spot could have gone to an NXT guy or a surprise entrant. What a waste.
#23 Randy Orton – Here comes trouble. Was I the only one who noticed he came out to his own theme song and not the Orton/Wyatt mix as he had for the past few months? He only had the one elimination but that was enough for him to win the match. His RKO on a flying Sami Zayn was amazing.
#24 Dolph Ziggler – Meh. I completely forgot he was in the match. As you can tell, I’m not a fan of Ziggler. Could have had an earlier spot really, give a late spot to someone who deserves it more.
#25 Luke Harper – Here comes the interesting entry for me. Will he side with his family or not. And we got our answer quickly! He almost hit Bray Wyatt with Wyatt’s own finisher! He got rid of Crews so thank you for that.
#26 Brock Lesnar – Here comes the pain! Lesnar was his usual self, being a monster and knocking everyone down before Goldberg showed up.
#27 Enzo Amore – Are you kidding me? You wasted the lucky #27 spot on a jobber? It could have gone to a Samoa Joe or any of the other two big names next. Another wasted spot on the Rumble, could have gone to a surprise entrant at least. Plus, he wasn’t supposed to be in this match right, it was all about Big Cass apparently. At least Lesnar killed him in seconds. Now imagine if it had been Samoa Joe entering in at #27 with Lesnar waiting for him in the ring. That would have been $$$.
#28 Goldberg – Now we’re talking. Goldberg and Lesnar in the same ring again and once again it did not last long, again in Goldberg’s favour. That was a huge surprise. He only lasted 3 minutes in the ring, one less than Brock so we still don’t know if he can do a proper match. He did have this cool moment with the next entrant.
#29 The Undertaker – Yes! Well that wasn’t my initial reaction, I was telling my parents Taker will be entrant #30, since he was that in 1997 and 2007. So WWE ruined my little fun there. He had that cool moment with Goldberg and got to action with some of the newer stars before some idiot eliminated him. And that idiot is…
#30 Roman Reigns – “Why? Oh for fuck sakes, why him again?” My exact reaction to see Reigns come out at #30. It could have been anyone. I was hoping to see Samoa Joe or Finn Balor or even Kurt Angle. It had to be a surprise entrant surely. I was on the edge of my seat and then Reign’s music hit. And I covered my face right away. Please not him. He’s already ruined the last two Rumbles. Thank fuck for Randy Orton. That’s all I can say.
You heard the boos from the crowd when Reigns showed up and it got louder when he eliminated Undertaker and Chris Jericho, the two big fan favourites. Why does WWE keep trying to shove Reigns down our throats. We don’t want to see him getting the push. Please stop it. He’s had his chance, give someone else that chance.
And also, why was Reigns in the Rumble and not AJ Styles? Like the crowd was chanting, “bullshit!”. Imagine if it was Styles in #30, the roof of the Alamodome would have blown off, the fans would have gone nuts, especially since he had a match just before the Rumble. If anything, Styles deserved that spot more, he came into the event a champion anyway but of course Vince McMahon’s favourite big men gets the push. I’m starting to think Vince has this unhealthy obsession of torturing and trolling the fans with bullshit decisions and have the guy he personally likes get the big push over guys who are way better like Styles.
Hell, I think I could have wrote a better Royal Rumble than that and I’m not even a professional writer, some parts were way too predictable. It’s the Royal Rumble, it’s not supposed to be predictable. And where was the surprise entrants? Apart from maybe Dillinger, there were none! There were at least 4 spots that could have gone to them but it had to go to the likes of Kalisto, Crews, Ellsworth and Amore (the last two were our joke/jobber entrants). If it was me, I would have used two of the guys from the UK tournament for that surprise factor. Would have been the best way to introduce a few new faces.
This Royal Rumble match could have so easily been one of the better ones. It had the potential but they really screwed it up big time. The final four were Reigns, Orton, Wyatt and Jericho and I can tell you Jericho and Wyatt are the two guys people really wanted to see win this one. They just couldn’t help themselves and go with the safe bet and a repeat winner (4th time in 5 years, not good at all). Why not Wyatt winning it, that would make him a huge star. Why not give Chris Jericho his long overdue Rumble win?
Also, apart from Jericho, all the eliminations were done by a big sized guy. Come on Vince, we know you love big sweaty man but this is too much. Oh yeah and the bit about the predictable entries, there was also a pattern to it, apart from Kofi’s entrance. A couple of Raw guys goes in, then a couple of SmackDown guys then Raw then Smackdown and repeat and repeat.21 to 25, Smackdown guys. 26 to 30, Raw guys. Need I say more.
We all want that Jericho-Owens match at WrestleMania. But they just had to do it, put Reigns in a position to win and have Orton end up winning. I like Orton but he’s not the guy I want to see headlining WrestleMania against John Cena of all people. If it was Orton vs Styles or Wyatt, I’d be ok with that. Come on WWE, do what you claim to do and actually listen to the fans, give us a good Rumble finish for once next year. Stop pushing Reigns. Please, just stop doing it. It’s not working. Don’t get me wrong, the Rumble match was alright, good even I’d say. The near ending of it almost completely ruined it for me. There was no need for it. Reigns didn’t need to show up or be #30 or be in the final two. Thank god Randy Orton prevented another nightmare.